Carers Group: 4/3/24

Janet’s presented a piece on Wendy Mitchell’s recent death.

Wendy decided to end her own life. She discussed her reasons on her website: “My Final Hug in a Mug“.

Member updates

Family difficulties

A mum has had dementia for seven years. During her daughter’s own cancer treatment she was looking after her mum as well. While the daughter was at a vulnerable time her brother and sister took over caring for mum and cut her out. She doesn’t know why they are being like that. The sister is overturning mum’s decisions. She has put cameras in mum’s house – even in the bedroom. Mum lives in her own flat and her brother and sister go round for meds. Her sister has Lasting Power of Attorney (LPA).

The daughter had spoken to the Social Worker but did not feel her concerns were addressed. Janet recommended asking for a best interest meeting. Tatiana said Social Services have not addressed the daughter’s questions (manipulation, safeguarding) and recommended emailing them saying she is not satisfied and to set out all her concerns.

She needs to tell social services about the cameras (invasion of privacy) and how mum used to be. Also to say that she has less interaction and outline briefly what has happened and the effect it’s having on her. Tatiana – also reiterated safeguarding and highlighting the cameras.

Peace of Mind

Another mum is more settled in her care home home. After a hospital eye appointment mum was able to settle back in quicker. It’s a lovely home. The staff are hardworking and caring which gives the daughter confidence. She was confident enough to have a holiday in Italy.

Council Funding

A mum has had another assessment. Finally someone came from the financial team and recommended that they have funding from the council. Her mum is stable and happy. The daughter said thank you for the advice last time, it was very helpful.

Keeping in Touch

A brother living abroad is is ok. Some weeks they only have short conversations but he still knows who his sister is. She isn’t always able to speak to staff in depth due to the time. Guardianship is all arranged. Someone takes her brother out weekly. He’s not so happy going to crowded places now.